Taste

The various flavours of life is getting me down. man.

Sundays

For the longest time, Sunday has been my most disliked day of all. Sunday was the day where i did not plan anything, where all the hope and despair of the coming week would come and pile on me. I have no idea when this started, planning anything on Sunday was weird for me, and i hardly if ever meet up with friends on Sunday. When i think more about it, i think the reason i dislike Sundays is because i have such expectations and forced disappointments for the day and the week that it is so depressing. Two days ago, i decided to turn things around in my life. My world, as of then is perfect. It is perfect in every way and Sundays would do nothing to change that, so there.

Viola

Make me a willow cabin at your gate,
And call upon my soul within the house;
Write loyal cantons of contemned love
And sing them loud even in the dead of night;
Hallow your name to the reverberate hills
And make the babbling gossip of the air
Cry out 'Olivia!' O, you should not rest
Between the elements of air and earth,
But you should pity me.

The greatest love of all? What really is the greatest love of all? How many type of love is true love? Is love anything more than a perception? Easily controlled, easily swayed. and easily wrong? What if Sebastian never turned up at the end? Viola would be misunderstood forever, left alone. Is that the limits of true love? It is so easy to see a pattern in random, especially as humans. I have no idea what i am saying any more, the most miserable thing to do has to be being a cynic at a comedy. There is nothing to be read between the lines but somehow...

google sucks >:(

What happened? Well, i created a new email to act as my new primary email for this blogger account, guess what? No go. Why? I have no idea, just that according to google, you can only have one email, ever. Ok, so then i made my new gmail account as a co-author of my blogs, with admin status, that worked. Then, i wanted to create a new blog but apparently i had to verify my account by giving them my phone number, WTH? I don't even use my full name online, and they want me to give some software my phone number? No freaking way! So then i tried to to go back to my original account to create a new blog then give this new email co-author status, like i did my other blogs but no go, they still wanted my phone number. Suddenly, my old email account was untrustworthy. It may seem like i'm exaggerating but google does indeed collect its users' data and use these data. I am not 100% sure that this data is not sold to companies and such and i see no reason why i should trust them. Seriously, i have no qualms with switching to livejournal or blog.com, or the tons of other blog hosting websites. Ok, enough of all this, bottom line, i'm not giving them any of my personal data, ever.

SC update

So i didn't make it into the council. Can't say that i didn't expect it but i can't say that i wasn't disappointed either. Ah well, you lose some, you lose some. Maybe i'm just not seen as leadership material? So be it then. Maybe i'll run again next year? Maybe not.

SC

So the elections results are gonna be out today, i'm kinda nervous, and apprehensive. The whole process was quite fun, i didn't really campaign or anything but the whole idea of getting involved got me all worked up. I kinda wish the results won't be out so soon but regardless of whether i got in or not, it was still a fun experience. I'll update here once i know the results.

Life? Truth? Justice?

I was thinking, you know, most of us just want to fit in, heck, any normal person would want to find a place in society that needs us, and play that role. That's how humans roll, that's how we function as a society but it's not an easy task. We all strive to find a niche, feel important, feel significant in our social circle. It becomes so scary when we think we are not needed, like we are left to ourselves, to live, to die, alone. Humans become desperate when that happens, grasping at straws of life. To be honest, that seems to be such a narrow frame of mind to work with. It is entirely possible and perhapes easy for some to live and die with the tide of humans, leaning and supporting each other. Yet, what if you don't fit into the circle? What if there is no space for you? Should we squeeze into the circle, living our lives under the excess stress that we choose? Should we leave and try to find another community? Or maybe, we could just let go? Maybe, just maybe, we can look at life as a dream, what is life but the dust on the dreamer's eyelids? Life doesn't have to be as serious as all that, does it? What is important in life? How hard we have worked? How much we have contributed to society? How much people remembers us? How happy we are, were or could be? Maybe life is not as sacred and magical as we try to imagine. Success doesn't mean much, failure doesn't mean much. What matters? Only the dreamer knows. I guess at the end, what i was really getting at is that, i don't want to cry any more, not for anything, especially if they don't matter.

Awfully Towers?

Urgh, the weather right now. It is so cold for a while then so hot after a while, yea, i know, Japan is having the whole weather disaster and coping with it right now but it doesn't make the weather here any less unbearable. Anyway, what was i gonna say? I completely forgot... Darn it. Ah well, i got some pictures to share. Earlier last week, we were playing with the adorable sugar cubes at Awfully Chocolate and we made two sugar towers! (mine is on the right) We managed to get the one on the left to really high before it collapsed, then we tried to rebuild it again! ^^ I took pictures of the towers falling and rebuilding again, it reminded my of L from Deathnote, now i know why he likes to play with his sugary food, they are soo cute and fun to stack! Stack 'em! Stack 'em! Stack 'em! :P

One last thing, i decided to stop fiddling with the templates and just use a template from blogger, it seems too much trouble to keep bothering with the html of the current template, and i'm a lazy person, so bear with this distorted template for a while, i'll set the new one up before my next post, promise!

banane

I fell like crap right now, really really stupid crap. I feel like i can't work my way out of a cardboard box, and i probably actually can't.

banane?

Right now, i feel like i'm pretty helpless... it seems like i am always wrong, i can't seem to get the hang of things at all. Every time i feel like i finally got the hang of something, something comes right back to slap me cold on the face. It is beyond annoying, it feels incredibly depressing, like you are struggling alone on a vast ocean. Is this all i am? Is this all i will be? It is so harsh to live life without illusions, especially about myself.

Movie!

So a few days ago, i was clearing out some stuff and i found this movie ticket, lol, student price i think. Anyway, it's for the live action Death note 2 movie, the last stand, or something like that. Apparently i watched this about 5 years ago, how time flies, i don't think this theatre is still around any more.. not too sure. I can't actually even remember who i watched it with. I personally thought the movie was pretty good, not as good as the movie but there were some good parts. It always gets so awkward after i run out of things to write about, i never know how to end these posts, umm, c'est la vie?